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Jan. 28th, 2009

Log Title: Holding Pieces of Dieing Ember
Location: Corridors
Characters Involved: Blake Parker (youllbeokay) and anyone else who wants to join.
Summary of Log: Blake can't sleep... again.
Rating: PG

A bunch of things were all adding up together to make Blake Parker frustrated. He was in a phase where school work seemed unimportant. He had no idea where that attitude had come from though. This was his last year in Hogwarts, this was the year that mattered, and yet he couldn't force himself to concentrate on his homework (or any other thing to do with school) for more than half an hour at a time. It was annoying to say the least, especially when he didn't even have a decent enough reason for being so distracted. Or any reason in the first place. He almost wanted to start skipping classes again. He had done a couple of times already, though it wasn't exactly the same as before - This time he was getting told off for it. By either Tad or some teacher. More so Tad. Tad wasn't happy with the spontaneous class skippings at all.

He was moody for no reason. Blake kept snapping at people, be it a teacher, some randomer, or even one of his best friends. Most recently Jack. He had blamed Jack because he had got drunk a couple of nights before. Yeah, blaming Jack was the best idea... Far from it actually. Blake still had no idea why he'd been so stupid to say that. It wasn't exactly Jack's fault that Blake couldn't resist guzzling down alcohol. He didn't half do some idiotic things, sometimes.

And he was craving attention. Not in the cuddles sort of way, he wanted so much more. Half a year and counting. Half a year without sex. Nearly a year since meaningful sex. The more that Blake thought about it, the more he craved it. He couldn't bring it up with Mags though. Definitely not now. It was possible that they could have already passed that stage, had she not been pregnant. It was driving him insane. Every 'what if' scenario was taunting him. If Jack hadn't stepped in, if the Death Eaters hadn't kidnapped him... He wanted to go so much further with Mags, yet it was almost as if he wasn't allowed to. Even a joke about it would upset Mags or anger her...

He always seemed to think up these what if situations whenever he was trying to sleep. And the answers always plagued him, and kept him awake. It was no different tonight. Blake Parker just could not sleep, so he had just been wandering corridors for a while, all well knowing the risk that he'd get a detention for being out after hours. But he didn't care. Someone to talk to at least would have been nice, however it was questionable whether anybody was actually going to be awake or not. Most people tended to be in bed by now.

Comments

youllbeokay
Feb. 2nd, 2009 12:36 pm (UTC)
The smile kept itself on Blake’s face, as Lanisa was so easily distracted from telling him off moments before. This would have been a good moment to think up an excuse for why he was out so late, however he was way too amused at how easily he had taken the attention off him. It didn’t last as long as he thought it would though, seeing as Lanisa had returned to her scolding. Eek. “I uh…” Blake began, looking down and scuffing his shoe against the floor as if he was a small child attempting a way out of getting in trouble. “I just couldn’t sleep.” He looked up again. “Not a fantastic excuse, but hey, it’s truth.”

The quick conversation switch to Mags caught him off guard a little. “Um… yeah.” Blake answered, though seemingly a little unsure about the whole situation. “I mean we’re good at the moment… Just a matter of time before our next argument, I guess.” He finished with an awkward laugh. Blake had been thinking a lot about his relationship with Mags lately. As much as he wanted to show that he was going to be there supporting her through everything, he couldn’t ignore the facts, no matter how hard he tried – his girlfriend was carrying another person’s child. It hurt, but he couldn’t admit that. Really, who could he talk to? The only other person who actually knew about Mags’ pregnancy was Ruby, and Blake wasn’t exactly close to her… and what was to say she wouldn’t pass whatever he would say onto Mags? And Mags… No, he wasn’t going to upset her any more. He couldn’t do that. Blake needed somebody to talk to… but the fact of the matter was that he couldn’t. Nobody else needed to know anything. It wasn’t his place to tell people, so he had to deal with it on his own. After his long pause, he looked back towards Lanisa. “Our relationship is different, to say the least. But I make her happy… I think. And as long as she’s happy, well I am too.”

It was all very well saying that, but seeing as Lanisa had just mentioned that she had already seen Mags unhappy today, then their relationship obviously didn’t seem to give off a good air. This was awkward, beyond all reason. A conversation change wouldn’t be so bad. “What about you and Tad?” Blake asked, brightening up a little. “I mean he doesn’t exactly say much, so…”